October 5 – It’s Not The Green Pants Fault

It’s not the green pants fault. I should really wear them again. Besides, colored trousers are in fashion.  Paired with a black chunky necklace, a black bebe top and my swede heels again and I am ready for a night on the town.  Too bad my cousin’s wife ruined it for me by telling me how fertile she was.  In the most annoying, high-pitched, extremely dramatic, Bollywood actress accent, she says “The minute we decided to have a baby I became pregnant the veeerrrrryyyyyy same night!  I am soooooo fertile!  I have to try so hard to not get pregnant.”

Well good for you bitch.  That fertility you’re bragging about gave you that big ass too. Don’t hear you bragging about that.

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